How Did Learning Self-Hypnosis Help Me?- Vol. 528, Aug. 26, 2021

To be honest, I learned how to do self-hypnosis as a part of my training in hypnotism back in 2002 which I first entered this fantastic world of learning how to use the mind in the fashion that it was built to be used.

Over the years I have been able to use it to disappear a non-cancerous brain tumor when all the doctors could promise was a stopping of its growth. I just spent a few minutes every day imagining it leaving my body and 2 years later the MRI showed that it was so small that if it was any smaller it wouldn’t be there. That was back in 2011.

I use self-hypnosis to do what is known as “future pacing” in the hypnosis business to create all sorts of extraordinary life and professional experiences. Back in 2011 and again in 2013 I was invited to go to first Nairobi, Kenya to work with a 19-year-old I had met with his father in Denver, Colorado. The second trip was to do some interesting volunteer work in Uganda. I was able to create the opportunities to come to Isreal, not once but twice in a decade.

I have also used self-hypnosis techniques that I have learned to let go of past negative emotions, limiting beliefs, and feelings of harm from others – letting them go into the either no longer an issue in my life.

You see, once you learn how to really do these things, miracles can be created in one’s life allowing one to let go of that which is no longer of service and bring in those things that are of service and a ton of fun.

So, yes, self-hypnosis can be very powerful for those who learn how to do it well – which takes practice as in the case in anything that one learns that is new to them.

Claim Your Excellent Life #346 – How to Deal with Boring Texters

Master Hypnotist Suzanne Kellner-Zinck addresses the issue of boring texters.
 
 
 
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What Boundaries Do I Keep With My Clients? Vol. 527, Aug. 19, 2021

This is a question that I received from a person on Quora and this is the way I answered it:

I am answering this question from the point of a non-licensed hypnotist with 28 years of experience in mental health and 19 years of practice in hypnotism.

My boundaries are very simple:

  1. I allow my clients to call me when they are having difficulties or email me so that I can make sure that they are okay and given the input to help them to regain their grounding.
  2. I let my clients know before they are hired by me as their provider that we may have times when they will not like me much because I will either be pushing them to heal in ways that may not be comfortable or because being imperfectly human I did not understand what they were saying in the way that they meant it. In either case, we need to work these situations through so that they can better address similar situations out there in their own lives with those they encounter.
  3. They can use whatever language they choose to use with me – I won’t take it personally and understand that all people have their own manner of communication so I don’t stand on any pretense of what is allowed while working with me – so long as it is respectful I don’t care.
  4. To realize that I am a hypnotist and not a mind reader so if they have a concern it is best that they bring it up so we can work it through.
  5. Rates depend on the issues being resolved – it is a program fee and they agree to it before we begin.
  6. I will definitely use a metaphor (storytelling) and sometimes of my own interesting learnings from difficulties similar to what the client is going through to teach them how to better approach things as case histories and wisdom gained is some of the most important knowledge my clients get from me after letting go of the traumas and the learnings gained through that process according to my client’s feedback.
  7. To be available for sessions when it works best for my clients as I am there to serve them, which is the opposite of how many practitioners operate. I learned this from David Gilgun, my first mentor (not trainer) of hypnosis and NLP who used to work in the oncology ward of Beth Israel Hospital in Boston. He was at that hospital at whatever time the client needed him there – period! I know – that is a very different approach from the suited-up therapists out there. Hey, I want my clients to be relaxed when we work, so it is best for them to come when they are already relaxed, not worrying about time frames.
  8. My sessions run as long as they need to for my client to leave in a much ‘lighter and brighter’ space than when they began the session. I am successful about 95% of the time, maybe more.

Basically, I break every rule that is formed from the world of conventional therapy – and my clients do not need to see me for the rest of their lives to be healed – most can do it in a matter of a few longer sessions and a couple of follow-ups. I stand by the amazing results my clients receive from working with a human being with feelings and the ability to build quick rapport – like on the free consultation call – and then get immediately into the healing process.

I thank you for the opportunity to once again throw the conventional manner of doing this work on its proverbial head. 19 Years of practice gives one the facts with the results gained which is after all what the client is coming to you to receive – freedom from the emotional pain that brought them in to do the work in the first place, right?

I will say that my work is not for the timid or those who like to whine about their past week after week – My work is for those who are ‘sick of being sick’ and ‘sick of being stuck’ to quickly regain their lives and create a compelling future for themselves. It is a paradigm of healing rather than one of pathology.

 

Claim Your Excellent Life #345 – Time to Stop the People Pleasing

Master Hypnotist Suzanne Kellner-Zinck explains why people-pleasing behavior is unhealthy and what to do about it.
 
 
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What is Therapy Like for Teens? – Vol. 526, August 12, 2021

This is an interesting question for sure. I am not a licensed therapist, rather a hypnotist, and what I have found in my work is that it is much better if I can get the teen to have their parent in the session rather than not. There is a reason for this that many don’t really think through. First, the teen will not have a clear idea of their entire history because the memory only goes back so far. This is even more true for those who have been traumatized. Secondly, a lot of healing can occur when I have both of them together doing the work. Does it work all the time – no, it doesn’t. However, for those who have been willing or even wanting their parents there with them, magical healing has occurred on both sides of the relationship.

You see, I don’t go into my sessions believing the parents are necessarily the bad people here. In fact, we know that our memories are not what we believe they are with many things deleted causing distortions. We also know that a younger person under the age of 25 prefrontal cortex hasn’t matured completely yet, so they have limited ability to reason, rationalize, or judge. This is a physiological fact. Parents can indeed help their kids better understand what the truth was back when the situation occurred. I have several examples from which to choose, but I will use a few to illustrate my point.

I had a 15-year-old client who wouldn’t go to school and didn’t know why. It went back to her father’s dying of brain cancer when she was six years old. Her mom was able to help her understand how important she was to her dad’s feeling loved and cared for as her 6-year-old self gave him her favorite stuffed animals to love. As a little girl, she spent hours in his hospital bed at home while her older siblings were unable to be there seeing their dad hooked up to the medical machinery. So, with that knowledge and healing, this 15-year-old was able to return to school and do well as reported by her mom at year’s end.

I have another 17-year-old who came to me because she wasn’t doing well in her ice hockey games – something that she excelled out for ages. It was as I was doing the work to clear this issue that her mother wrote a note to me telling me that her daughter had lost 4 of her close friends in the last 3 years. Was there anything I could do about that? Well, because she was there in the session, I was able to help her daughter with that much larger issue in her daughter’s life.

So, we need to be careful not to make judgments and to do the best we can to understand the whole situation. Of course, if a teen would prefer their parent not be there with them, that is up to them and of course, the info is kept confidential but I do believe that you can better understand why I do things the way I do with these 2 of hundreds of stories of parent-child healing through the years.

Loving Partnership Require Having Humility & Being Honorable – Vol. 531, Sept. 16, 2021

Today I want to speak to the idea that being a loving person in a primary relationship as well as any type of relationship requires a sense of humility and a recognition of the importance of being honorable.

All too often we humans create a sense of who is ‘right’ and who is ‘wrong’ instead of realizing that there are infinite ways to understand a circumstance. We have this great need to jump to conclusions that are anything but aligned with reality because our minds are wonderful at creating stories to back up our feelings. Yet, in a truly loving relationship, there is no need to create a story. Instead, there is a desire to understand through honest communication what is going on because there has been a foundation of trust upon which to build.

I know that in my truly loving relationships the disagreements, the need to prove the other wrong was never there. Questions were asked and discussions were had, pure and simple. When relationships started to lose the loving quality, stories were created and resentment ensued. In these cases, I pulled myself out of these relationships not desiring to be a ’cause’ of someone else’s distress – because, in many of these cases, it had less to do with who I am and more of who the other person was being for whatever their reasons. Without having control over the other person, the healthiest thing to do was to limit the time with them.

Going back to my most loving of relationships, and I have many of them thank, God – I show up for these folks as they show up for me. It is just an understanding that we are there for one another. We may not agree on everything in life, but what we do agree on is that we truly care and support one another in those ways that we can as we can without the need to be asked in many cases. We just are there for one another because we can.

It is through these loving relationships that we have in our lives that the difficulties can be made much easier. It is through the difficulties of others that we can rise to the occasion to bring the love and care deepening the trust and love inside that relationship. Because it is only when we are able to be there for others in this sort of manner that we can truly understand what real ‘love’ is all about. It isn’t forcing another to be perfect according to your ideals, and it isn’t about having to check everything that you do and say. It is about being loved and accepted by each other for exactly who you are realizing that till you are perfect, there is no need to expect that from anyone else – that is the humility.

Being honorable has everything to do with being your word. So often these days people will promise things to forget about the promise or find a way to wiggle out of it. Best to demonstrate that you can be on time doing those things you promised to do. Or, do not make the promise in the first place, which is the more honorable thing to do if you are not in a place where you can or want to follow through.

It is about knowing that we all have our difficulties in life and to be present to the degree that we can be to be loving and supportive of our loved ones – because maybe it was this person who helped you through your difficult time, maybe without even being asked, just jumping in to make sure you were okay. Because at least to my mind that is what a loving relationship is – being present, being caring, being humble, and being interested. It does not take much to demonstrate these attributes these days, not at all. Just letting the person you claim to care so much about a message, a text, a phone call, a video call, or even a letter or a card to let them know that you were thinking of them and that you care and are interested.

Learning: All truly loving relationships are built on a foundation of humility and being honorable. Be your word and realize there are many ways in which to understand a given circumstance. More often than not we do not have all the information till we ask for it. And, follow through on what you said you would do, timely.

Overcoming Learned Helplessness – Vol. 525, August 5, 2021

So many people have learned helplessness as a part of their psychology, so I thought I would give you a method to overcome it.

Learned helplessness comes about because you took in the messages that you would never be able to amount to anything. Interestingly enough, there are many people who have been told the same thing to become amazing doing those things that they were told they would never be able to do. These folks used the notion of ‘proving’ someone else wrong to motivate them to do amazing things.

Taking a learning from the above folks, the best thing that you can do is figure out a project that is important to you to accomplish. It can be anything that you feel is worth your time – meaning that it need not have to do with income production though it can. Maybe it has more to do with fulfilling your dreams of being an artist, writing a book, or going into some profession that you feel called to. Or maybe it has to do with doing something with a non-profit to help others. So long as the project is something that both holds meaning for you and forces you to get out of your comfort zone, you will be learning how to overcome learned helplessness.

I can tell you from my own experience that there are few things that are more fulfilling than pushing myself to do those things that I never thought I could accomplish, but got to work and made them happen anyway. Getting my NLP Trainer’s Certificate was among the most difficult things I ever did, given the immense amount of knowledge that needed to be taken in and applied in such a short period of time.

Many of my trips abroad were also quite interesting and forced me out of my comfort zone doing things that I was requested to do in some cases and getting my second master’s degree at the International School here at the University of Haifa. The courses are taught in English, but when you go to the store, bank, or wherever to do business it is all in Hebrew and I don’t speak the language. I can phonetically read the signs but that is about it. Still, it’s been a most amazing experience.

So, dream your largest dreams and go with them with all you have got and you will find your way out of learned helplessness – because when you have a compelling future that is more meaningful to you than being stuck, action will take place to make it your reality.

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