Claim Your Excellent Life #348 – What I Have Learned From My Clients

Master Hypnotist Suzanne Kellner-Zinck shares the lessons she has learned from her clients.
 
 
 
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What Happens When People Stay in Unhappy Marriages? Vol. 529, Sept. 2, 2021

Today we are going to learn the truth about what happens when people stay in unhappy marriages. Dana Adam Shapiro has done research on this question for his book “You Can Be Right (or You Can Be Married.’ He has found that only 17% of married people are happy, which means that 83% of married couples are unhappy. Why did this happen? According to Shapiro, the main reasons were: lack of communication, dishonesty, and adultery.

Daniel Hawkins and Alan Booth wrote an article, “Unhappily Ever After: Effects of Low-Quality Marriages on Well-Being” published in Social Forces, a peer-reviewed journal based on the tracking of unhappy marriages over 12 years.

For anyone who has been in an unhappy marriage, these findings will resonate:

1. Significantly lower levels of overall happiness, life satisfaction, self-esteem, and overall health.

and

2. Elevated levels of psychological distress.

One question that always comes to my mind when I find myself working with couples is whether or not the relationship is a healthy one with some workout-able problems or if it is a marriage that is at its core unhealthy for both partners?

Now, given that I am indeed a hypnotist, there is a process known as future pacing that can tell me the answer to this question from the mouths of my clients. While in a deep hypnotic trance state, they go out into their future and see if their partner is still there or has disappeared. Because the unconscious mind of the client realizes what is going to happen out there in the future better than the conscious that ‘thinks it knows what it wants.’

But what if you could prevent this from occurring in your marriage in the first place?

What if you could know yourself well enough, love yourself enough to be able to attract a person who also knows themselves well enough and loves themselves enough to call in the ‘right person’ to begin with?

What if you could learn how to better communicate first to yourself and then to your loved one – instead of pretending to know more than you do about both of you?

What if were possible to accept yourself and your partner for who you both are, instead of deciding that one or both of you aren’t good enough?

What if you could create a situation where unconditional love and acceptance could be your foundation?

It is quite possible to allow this to be your truth, however, to allow that to come forth we need to know what we need to clean up first in regard to our own thinking and then in regards to how we communicate with our partner.

***For those of you who are either in unhappy relationships or unable to create healthy partnerships with others, I am running a 3-Day Retreat “Bringing True Love to Your Primary Relationship” Oct. 2-4, 2021 at the beautiful Villa Serena Holistic Hotel & Retreat Center right on the water of  the Dominican Republic. You may get more information regarding the retreat here:

Upcoming Events

It is the perfect environment to do both the deep transformative work while having a relaxing venue. 

Claim Your Excellent Life # 347 – Not Getting Involved in Divisive Conversations

Master Hypnotist Suzanne Kellner-Zinck shares advice on how to handle divisive conversations with combative people.
 
 
 
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How Did Learning Self-Hypnosis Help Me?- Vol. 528, Aug. 26, 2021

To be honest, I learned how to do self-hypnosis as a part of my training in hypnotism back in 2002 which I first entered this fantastic world of learning how to use the mind in the fashion that it was built to be used.

Over the years I have been able to use it to disappear a non-cancerous brain tumor when all the doctors could promise was a stopping of its growth. I just spent a few minutes every day imagining it leaving my body and 2 years later the MRI showed that it was so small that if it was any smaller it wouldn’t be there. That was back in 2011.

I use self-hypnosis to do what is known as “future pacing” in the hypnosis business to create all sorts of extraordinary life and professional experiences. Back in 2011 and again in 2013 I was invited to go to first Nairobi, Kenya to work with a 19-year-old I had met with his father in Denver, Colorado. The second trip was to do some interesting volunteer work in Uganda. I was able to create the opportunities to come to Isreal, not once but twice in a decade.

I have also used self-hypnosis techniques that I have learned to let go of past negative emotions, limiting beliefs, and feelings of harm from others – letting them go into the either no longer an issue in my life.

You see, once you learn how to really do these things, miracles can be created in one’s life allowing one to let go of that which is no longer of service and bring in those things that are of service and a ton of fun.

So, yes, self-hypnosis can be very powerful for those who learn how to do it well – which takes practice as in the case in anything that one learns that is new to them.

Claim Your Excellent Life #346 – How to Deal with Boring Texters

Master Hypnotist Suzanne Kellner-Zinck addresses the issue of boring texters.
 
 
 
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What Boundaries Do I Keep With My Clients? Vol. 527, Aug. 19, 2021

This is a question that I received from a person on Quora and this is the way I answered it:

I am answering this question from the point of a non-licensed hypnotist with 28 years of experience in mental health and 19 years of practice in hypnotism.

My boundaries are very simple:

  1. I allow my clients to call me when they are having difficulties or email me so that I can make sure that they are okay and given the input to help them to regain their grounding.
  2. I let my clients know before they are hired by me as their provider that we may have times when they will not like me much because I will either be pushing them to heal in ways that may not be comfortable or because being imperfectly human I did not understand what they were saying in the way that they meant it. In either case, we need to work these situations through so that they can better address similar situations out there in their own lives with those they encounter.
  3. They can use whatever language they choose to use with me – I won’t take it personally and understand that all people have their own manner of communication so I don’t stand on any pretense of what is allowed while working with me – so long as it is respectful I don’t care.
  4. To realize that I am a hypnotist and not a mind reader so if they have a concern it is best that they bring it up so we can work it through.
  5. Rates depend on the issues being resolved – it is a program fee and they agree to it before we begin.
  6. I will definitely use a metaphor (storytelling) and sometimes of my own interesting learnings from difficulties similar to what the client is going through to teach them how to better approach things as case histories and wisdom gained is some of the most important knowledge my clients get from me after letting go of the traumas and the learnings gained through that process according to my client’s feedback.
  7. To be available for sessions when it works best for my clients as I am there to serve them, which is the opposite of how many practitioners operate. I learned this from David Gilgun, my first mentor (not trainer) of hypnosis and NLP who used to work in the oncology ward of Beth Israel Hospital in Boston. He was at that hospital at whatever time the client needed him there – period! I know – that is a very different approach from the suited-up therapists out there. Hey, I want my clients to be relaxed when we work, so it is best for them to come when they are already relaxed, not worrying about time frames.
  8. My sessions run as long as they need to for my client to leave in a much ‘lighter and brighter’ space than when they began the session. I am successful about 95% of the time, maybe more.

Basically, I break every rule that is formed from the world of conventional therapy – and my clients do not need to see me for the rest of their lives to be healed – most can do it in a matter of a few longer sessions and a couple of follow-ups. I stand by the amazing results my clients receive from working with a human being with feelings and the ability to build quick rapport – like on the free consultation call – and then get immediately into the healing process.

I thank you for the opportunity to once again throw the conventional manner of doing this work on its proverbial head. 19 Years of practice gives one the facts with the results gained which is after all what the client is coming to you to receive – freedom from the emotional pain that brought them in to do the work in the first place, right?

I will say that my work is not for the timid or those who like to whine about their past week after week – My work is for those who are ‘sick of being sick’ and ‘sick of being stuck’ to quickly regain their lives and create a compelling future for themselves. It is a paradigm of healing rather than one of pathology.

 

Claim Your Excellent Life #345 – Time to Stop the People Pleasing

Master Hypnotist Suzanne Kellner-Zinck explains why people-pleasing behavior is unhealthy and what to do about it.
 
 
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