May 04 2023

What Situations Is Hypnosis Great for Resolving – Vol. 623 May 4, 2023

Hypnosis is great for many things, however, one needs to find a hypnotist (hypnotherapist) that specializes in the area where one is requesting help. This information can usually be found on their website. Most people realize that hypnosis is excellent for stopping smoking, and weight loss (though it is a bit more complex than many hypnotists would make you believe and it is best to have one who dropped a substantial amount of weight and kept it off to know you have someone who can truly help you. And, of course, stress release.

I specialize in working with people with emotional issues so we can call it anger, sadness, overwhelm, stress, etc. Or we can call these issues as they are called in the world of mental health – depression, anxiety, etc. In my case, I have innovated in the areas of anorexia (but the client must have a healthy weight because I work with the emotional end of things NOT being a medical doctor), bulimia, and sex addiction.

Kids are naturally in a state of hypnosis up to the age of 26 when the prefrontal cortex is finally fully developed – so they are easy to work with so long as they want to be healed of their issues.

However, hypnotists cannot work with those who have personality disorders or have psychotic features. So any hypnotist who says they can is not educated enough to tell you this and you need to walk away.

Mar 30 2023

Do most of the leaders of the big US evangelical churches use mass hypnosis techniques? Vol. 622 -March 30, 2023

Yes, they do, by knowing how to mesmerize (Franz Mesmer, hypnotist from the 1700s) their parishioners. They know how to tell great stories – so that is the use of metaphor. They know how to use their intonations to ‘mark out words’ and for the faith healers, they know how to use multiple suggestions to bypass the conscious mind of their congregant who truly wants to be healed – the congregant has to 100% believe in the power of the minister to allow this to happen.

When you see people fall to the floor with faith healings, it looks very similar to what you see some of the subjects do during stage hypnosis shows.

I don’t know if they actually know that they are using the techniques of hypnotism since I don’t know any personally, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t being done.

The other thing that I want you to know though is that the number 1 hypnotist is your computer and 2nd your television set. You see ads on these things all the time telling you that you want stuff you never knew you wanted and then find yourself going out to buy it. It’s called marketing. The News on television hypnotizes people into states of anxiety – they are doing a great job these days with the coronavirus. So, the bottom line is that you are hypnotized by many different aspects of your life, you just really had no idea that it was happening. Now that you know you can make better decisions about what you allow into your unconscious/subconscious mind instead of being unknowingly hypnotized by the noise that is out there – everywhere you turn.

Thanks for your question Adrian, because you helped many others learn the truth about the environments in which we all live.

Mar 23 2023

Can someone be disrespectful if they don’t intend to be? Vol. 621 – March 23, 2023

This is an interesting question. I do believe that one CAN be disrespectful even if one doesn’t intend to be. There are many times when people have the best of intentions, yet make a hard situation worse, because they did not have all the information required to truly be of help. This happens every time someone chooses to do healthcare work that is outside of their scope of practice – it happens more times than you want to know. It happens when one overruns another’s personal boundaries by forcing their ideas on how to solve an issue, without respecting the other person’s choice, and it happens when we fail to listen fully to what another is telling us. This happens a lot between spouses and children whose parents think they know what’s best for them. Trust me, often they do not because they have no idea where their child is coming from.

Being respectful to another occurs when we ask if we can make a suggestion and then only make a suggestion and let it go.

Being respectful is listening fully to what another person is saying and them making sure you understand them before believing you have the answers to their problems (especially true if all the person really wanted was to be able to vent about a disturbing event and did not want a solution from you).

Being respectful is to stop forcing your opinions and ideas on someone who has a different manner of thinking about the subject. We all have our own opinions and we are all entitled to them.

If your best intention caused a problem, it is up to you to make the situation right again. Ask the other person what you can do to make it up to them and do your best to do as they tell you. Relationships work out a lot better this way.

Mar 16 2023

Am I the Only One Who Thinks That No One Really Knows Me? March 16, 2023

The only way that anyone will have a chance to really know you are if you are authentically engaging with others, without worrying what any one person thinks of you.

I tell my clients that we only really have time for a few really close friends, since the definition of being a real close friend to my mind, is someone who is there when needed, without excuses, and just shows up.

We are social beings like ants and bees, needing others to relate to.

So, if you don’t feel understood, notice if you even listen to yourself and those things that matter to you.

Then make sure you are interacting with people in an authentic way, so you know they like you for you, imperfections and all!

Mar 09 2023

Why is it me who always contacts people who are friends in my mind, while they rarely try to keep in touch with me? Do they think I am not their friend or I do not deserve that? Vol. 619 – March 9, 2023

In some cases, there are people who aren’t really your friends, and in some cases, they do indeed like and appreciate you a lot, yet are leading very busy lives. I have one friend that didn’t talk to me for the 3 years I was in California, yet, was more than happy to offer me a couch in her apartment for a week while I was dealing with my mom’s declining health. She is also one of the very few people that I will text with updates, since she can do that between her acupuncture patients, and because she never misinterprets what I write, able to hear my voice in her head – that is how well she knows me.

I love to entertain, and used to do it a lot while I was married and had the space to do it. The great thing about that was that people really appreciated my taking the time to put those gatherings together. Even 30 years later when I speak to my old friends, they let me know how much they miss those gatherings.

What you need to realize is that you get out of your life what you put into it, that is all there is to it. One needs to know which friends are good for what things. I have friends that I could rely on to bring me to the airport at 3 AM or whatever horrible hour because I did the same for them. I have other friends that I can rely on for other things. It just really depends on who fits into what in your life, because they all have a place, so long as you feel that they are people that are worth your time and energy.

I was just sharing with my youngest sister that friendships can indeed change over the years. She has a friend from 4th grade and they are now 50 years old. So, at this point, she isn’t putting as much time and emotion into it, because this friend wasn’t there for her while my sister was dealing with my mom’s declining health, and passing away in Sept. Her friend has different priorities now. We can’t tell others what their priorities are, all we can do is back off a bit and allow the relationships to shift. I had the same thing occur with a friend of mine from college that I have known now for 39 years. He was taking our relationship for granted so I backed the hell away. His son brought me back into his life, since his father doesn’t have many friends and was apparently missing our interactions. His son has now moved cross country, and I moved back to New England from California, so now he’s been FaceTiming me or calling me much more often and bringing his sense of humor, instead of all the negativity that pushed me away for many years.

So there you have it. The many faces of friendship.

Mar 02 2023

What is the Psychological Effect When One Ignores a Young Child’s Feelings? Vol. 618 – March 2, 2023

Based on the issues that my clients bring with them into my practice, ignoring a young child’s feelings in some cases stops their ability to normally attach to others. They don’t understand why they don’t feel close to others and they end up feeling very lonely. Some become sex addicts and romance addicts.

Depression and anxiety, loss of self-esteem as well as anorexia and bulimia, fit those who end up “self-loathing” their term, not mine.

When an infant is born, that baby needs unconditional love, needs a physical and emotional attachment to grow up with self-love and respect with the ability to attach to others normally – most important while developing a mating partnership.

You can search the blogs on this website for other articles on these subjects to better explain how these emotional issues occur.

Jan 26 2023

How Do You Cope With Change? Vol. 617, January 26, 2022

I am a person who thrives on change and gets bored very easily with the status quo. I have been known to do things to upset the status quo because of my boredom. It has made for a very interesting life.

So, how does one cope with the change?  You realize that there can always be a positive aspect to it, even if the change isn’t something you desired. In my own case, when my ex wanted out of our 20 years plus marriage, I was not happy about it – I was not yet ready to be on my own financially though I was quickly headed in that direction. However, it was much better that he leave because though we still loved one another, we were no longer IN LOVE with one another. We had grown at different rates emotionally and wanted different things in life. With his leaving, I was able to have my independence back which allowed me to travel and live in the different places that I was called to move to or visit.

If it is a job situation – man I have had so many jobs, I have lost count. I either fired most of my bosses or they fired me. I learned that I am unemployable because I have my own mind and my own way of doing things that don’t usually meet the requirements of the red tape and general bullshit that organizations put in place for legal reasons.

So, I have found that self-employment is the best way for me to go even though it is a challenge at times – however, the only people I have to work for are my clients whom I do my best to hire only those that best fit my manner of practicing hypnosis because I am only the right fit for those who are ready to ‘change’ now. I am not into endless appointments and going over the same sad stories. If I wanted to do that I could have become a licensed mental health practitioner – that is what they do all day long. No, I like to hear the story once, clear all the negative emotions and limiting beliefs as quickly as possible and get my clients working on putting their compelling futures in place. Those who are ready to heal love that concept even if it includes my kicking them in the proverbial ass on the way. The others, well they would be a better fit for a practitioner who would prefer to listen to the stories of woe endlessly.

My work is that of doing ‘change’ work for my clients and that is the way it is done. You make a decision to make the change even if it seems a bit scary because one doesn’t know what’s on the other side – and most times one will be better for making the change for the change needed to be made anyway.

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