May 19 2016

Spirituality: A Personal Understanding

  e836b30e2bfd083ecd0b470de7444e90fe76e6d318b8144892f1c0_640_spirituality-1Spirituality: A Personal Understanding – Vol. 362, May 19, 2016

I remember when I first started working in mental health back in 1993. The position I had was as the Social Coordinator of the program. It was a consumer position, meaning that the person who held this job had to be a consumer of mental health services. This was one of the most fun, yet challenging positions I ever had as we had close to 200 clients coming through the building every day for the various services provided. My position was in the social club called The Gathering Place It was a safe place for people with all sorts of mental health issues to hang out and do social activities together.

One day I was speaking to one of the other consumer providers about the whole idea of what spirituality is. I had told him that I didn’t think I was a spiritual person. He disagreed with me telling me that I had to be to be a spiritual person to be working with mentally ill people. He also knew that I absolutely loved my job.

So, I got to thinking about what spirituality means and I decided that this coworker of mine was correct. Because, to my mind, it is really about making the world better for having been here. Certainly working in a non-profit, for little money at the time, had less to do with the spiritual nature of the job then helping to raise the spirits of the clients in the program while teaching them better coping strategies.

Since that time I have had many other health issues to contend with and let me tell you I have learned more about spiritual practices along the way. My favorite example is from Kabbalah, where one is taught to be a channel for bettering others lives using your talents, education and interests to do your Creator’s work. I love that explanation, because though one can go to the religious buildings and go through the prayers and rituals, the true spiritual practice has much more to do with helping those that cross your path.

I had been away from the temple of my youth, the reform synagogue of Judaism for over 30 years, never having found one where I felt comfortable. Being a casual person, I needed a place where it felt fun and relaxing. Here in San Pedro, I found that place. However, as great as being around the music of my childhood and heritage is, even better is that I can sometimes feel my deceased dad’s presence with me while I am there. He wasn’t a religious person at all, raised in the orthodox synagogue, finding many of their rituals a bit much to deal with as he explained to me one afternoon. However, he did feel strongly that all his children needed to have an idea of who they were and that included the history of the Jewish people.

As I am writing this we are getting ready to celebrate Passover. It is during this holiday when we Jews are reminded that we were people in a strange land, after being let out of slavery. This is an important idea for us to always remember, because it is that idea which allows many of us to reach out to those who are being stripped of their rights, those who are less well off then we are, and those who are new to the country or even the town in which they live. To treat them with love, care and respect as we would like to be treated.

When I work with my clients I bring them up to their ‘higher” consciousness to allow them to be connected to their divine, whether it is the “universe”, “G_d”, Jesus, Buddha, or something else that they believe in. Because, it is in this fashion that we are able to get the defenses of the unconscious mind, the part that runs all of us, out of the way, to allow the healing to occur.  In helping with that healing, I am being of service to my Creator in the best way that I know how.

So, I have come a long way from my rational mind, into the realm of the spirit. If you are a person who hasn’t yet connected, realize that it was through my hypnosis training that I found my own understanding of spirituality. I was over 40 years old at the time and knew it was something that was missing from my life. I just didn’t know how to find a spiritual practice that worked for me. From what I learned in my hypnosis training, around the time someone is 40 or even 50 years old, is about the time most start looking for some spiritual practice to bring peace, calm and a sense of help from the divine into their life.

May 16 2016

146:Spirituality a Personal Understanding

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 13:56 — 12.8MB)

Master Hypnotist Suzanne Kellner-Zinck shares her personal journey on the spiritual path.

Listen to Stitcher

nbsp;

May 12 2016

Why People Cut Themselves

 

upset teenager photo

Photo by vandalog

Why People Cut Themselves – Vol. 361, May 12, 2016 

It’s 1994, I’m working at a supportive housing program for mentally ill adults. A young mother comes to me her first day in the program. She told me, “I have something to show you.” I brought her into the adjoining room, empty at the time so we could speak and she could show me what she had to show me in private. She raises her sleeve to show me 10 cuts she had made across her left forearm. I asked her what happened. She told me that she really didn’t remember doing it, just that she noticed the cuts and thought it best to let staff know. So, off to the emergency room we went to get her cuts cleaned up and a psychological evaluation done.  This particular client had been diagnosed with depression and borderline personality disorder. Sadly, the social worker at the hospital did not take her actions seriously, having seen her many times previously. A year later, I found out she did indeed manage to commit suicide.

I have worked in the world of mental health since 1993. And, the one thing I have noted is that those who cut themselves do it to feel calm. The clients that I have worked with who cut, were eating disordered for the most part. Many had numbed out their feelings sick of feeling hurt, sick of feeling rage, mostly toward themselves. They call it “self-loathing.”

Most often though, cutters cut themselves while they are in a dissociated state. They don’t feel it, they just notice the blood coming out which, calms them. Some will say that they cut to release the deep emotional pain they feel and bring it to a physical state instead. It hurts less to them in the physical state.

Interestingly enough some people will release endorphins, giving them a pleasurable “high” when they take a blade to their skin. Cutting becomes an addiction when it is used in this manner.

In some cases the scars are there to show the emotional pain that these young people are feeling. It can very difficult to speak about one’s problems, so It can be seen as a call for help. Though, in the majority of cases, they usually wear long sleeves or pants to hide the cutting they have done.

This is a huge problem here in the United States with 20% of the girls between 10 and 18 years of age cutting themselves or burning themselves with matches, etc, according to researchers at Yale University. So, this behavior is starting earlier then it once did. In the studies that were done in the 1990s these behaviors were only found in 3% or lower of the girls.

If you are having an issue with this, and you are using it to feel, “high” shift to something that is better for you like running or biking. If you are feeling hatred toward yourself, the best thing to do is to get yourself some professional help. For most of you, you are too young to be stuck feeling this way. Find someone with whom to speak about the problems that you are having. Many times this can help more then you would believe. If that doesn’t work, seek out some professional help to get you feeling better and to stop this self-injury and the self-loathing that is the cause for many of you. There are many positive qualities that you have, you just can’t perceive them on your own. That’s where getting someone to help you see what you can’t, will be very helpful to you indeed. 

Photo by vandalog

May 09 2016

145:Do You Know What Love is?

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 13:58 — 12.8MB)

Master Hypnotist Suzanne Kellner-Zinck shares the research and her thoughts on love.

May 05 2016

What is Your Relationship to Food?

Frutas e VegetaisWhat is Your Relationship to Food? – Vol. 360, May 5, 2016

Your relationship to food is a reflection of your relationship with life. If you feel tension regarding food, ask yourself, “Where else in my life do I feel tension?” Then address what comes up for you. If you feel stressed out, figure out where in your life you feel stressed out, and make the necessary changes.

Many weight loss clients focus on just that, weight loss, to become the sort of person they want to be in this life. The only problem with this is that until one develops a feeling of self-worth, the weight may not budge – or if it does, it will return because the underlining cause for the weight has not been dealt with.

If you are in a job or relationship that is stifling to you, feels destructive in some way, food could be the way that you soothe yourself. In this case, it is the relationship or the job that needs to change for the food issue to go away. Focusing on the future that you are creating for yourself will allow the food issues to diminish.

So many women in particular have no sense of hunger. They know what “starving feels like – ravenous before allowing any calories get by their lips. What they don’t know is what it feels like to be “hungry.”

To have a better idea of how this works in your body get a sense of what you feel like right after you ate an entire Thanksgiving dinner – so full you feel like you are going to explode. It was hard to move, along with that uncomfortable feeling in your gut.

Then think of a time when you were ravenous, you haven’t taken the time to eat all day long. Maybe you recall feeling tired and weak, along with not being able to think very clearly.

Then think of a time when you ate just till you felt satiated. When you had enough good energy for 4 or 5 hours. Your mind was working great and you felt very good.

Food effects how your are going to feel physically, mentally and emotionally, so it is important to give it the importance it requires and eat it in the way that it was meant to satiate you and nourish your body.

Think of food as nutrition only. When I work with my anorexic and bulimic clients, this is the main idea that needs to be gotten across to them. Without the proper nutrition your body will be unable to function properly. Once they get that idea cemented in their minds, they are more easily able to eat a balanced healthy diet.

For my overweight clients, it is all about learning how to fill themselves up feeling better about their lives instead of with food, while learning how to eat healthfully.

A diet high in grain products leads to high blood sugar and poor sensitivity to the hormone insulin. Poor insulin sensitivity has been shown to cause abdominal fat accumulation. A vicious cycle occurs with the more abdominal fat you store, the worse your insulin sensitivity becomes.

You can learn how to eat correctly by eating a protein rich breakfast – a couple of eggs cooked in coconut oil, with a slice of ham and some berries. You burn 25 calories for every 100 calories of protein you eat.

Good quality fats are important for the regulation of your hormonal balance, including many fat burning hormones. Good fats are grass finished butter, coconut oil, avocados, extra virgin olive oil, wild caught fish salmon, mackerel, tuna, and trout, grass fed beef, bison, free range chicken, whole free range eggs, nuts and seeds such as sunflower, and flax seed.

All these “fattening foods” will help to improve your overall fat-burning hormone balance, your satiety and feelings of fullness after a meal.

Veggies, all colors including many green ones. They are full of antioxidants and vitamins and minerals that your body needs.

Whole eggs with yolks loaded with vitamins, minerals and antioxidants.

Fatty fish are a great source of inflammation-reducing omega-3s

Coconut oil is a prime source of medium-chain triglycerides (MCTs) well known for appetite regulation, energy and immune benefits.

We crave the foods we are allergic to. If you are having issues with your skin or stomach pain, think about the foods you may be eating that may be causing it. Stop eating this food for a while and see if the symptoms go away. Keeping a food diary is a great way to keep track.

If you are living with a sleep deficit, that also can cause you to eat more food then you need because of your need for more energy. Do what you can to attend to your sleep deprivation, allowing food to be used for the energy the way it is supposed to.

People aren’t drinking enough water because they are consuming drinks with added sugar or worse diet sodas that make people hungry for the lack of calories in them. What they do have in them are various poisons to your body known as sugar substitutes. Tea and coffee are diuretics so they are not going to help hydrate you in the long run.

Your best bet is to drink plenty of water. If you like it better with some fresh juice, mix it half and half. The less juice the better though because you really don’t need all the fructose from the fruit juice.

Stay away from high fructose corn syrup in any foods and drinks hat you come across. This is a very dangerous product because our body doesn’t know how to use it for fuel. Also, the corn used to make it is genetically modified, making it worrisome. Stay away from soy and wheat for the same reason.

The most important thing to keep in mind is that you need a wide variety of whole foods. Stay away from foods that have ingredients you can’t pronounce or don’t know what they are. Stay away from packaged foods with artificial anything in them, because these are chemicals that your body doesn’t know how to deal with.

In my own case, I had to lose about 16 pounds to be where my weight has always been. All I did was a little exercise in the whirlpool of my health club – stretching and a bit of movement, eating whole foods, increasing the good fats and decreasing massively the amount of carbohydrates I was consuming. The net result so far has been going from 138 pounds to 122 pounds in less then four weeks. For my petite 5 foot frame, this is a reasonable weight at 54 years of age. So, the food choices you make are the most important for your health and body size along with disposing with anything in your life that is stressing you out. There was absolutely no calorie counting and there was no restriction from foods I love like a good hot cocoa made from Trader Joe’s Cocoa mix and some raw honey to sweeten it.

Our health is the most important thing we have. If we lose it, life doesn’t feel so good. I know, because I have spent too many years in the past ill, in one way or another. So, take care of those issues that you need to and eat well. Your body, mind and spirit will thank you as well as those with whom you interact every day.

May 02 2016

144: Your Environment Is Everything

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 16:59 — 15.5MB)

The physical, social and emotional environment around us has such a large effect on us. Listen to Master Hypnotist Suzanne Kellner-Zinck thoughts on our environment and how it affects us.


 

Apr 28 2016

Do You Listen to Your Child, I Mean Really, Do You Listen to What They Are Trying to Tell You?

 Autism Do You Listen to Your Child, I Mean Really, Do You Listen to What They Are Trying to Tell You? – Vol. 359, April 28, 2016

Over the past few months I have been working with a couple of super special teens. They both have been diagnosed with Asperger’s, though to tell you the truth, I just found out that this is a diagnosis that is no longer used (by Dr. Joel Schartz, who I interviewed for my Podcast “Claim Your Excellent Life” a few days ago on this very subject).

I also interviewed each of these two clients for my Podcast. Each of them had a ton to say about the way they felt they could be better if they were respected for who they were instead of feeling like they had to fit into a box they didn’t fit into. It was an interesting exercise to give them the mic and allow them to tell it the way they understand it.

So, what did we learn? Well, from Dr. Schartz I learned that people on the autism spectrum – the current way we are to “label” them – though I myself don’t really like labels generally speaking – are dealing with a lot of noise in their brains. Why? Because, instead of being able to concentrate on one sensory input like non-autism spectrum people, they are bombarded by all their senses all the time. This is why these folks tend to do things that calm them. The hyper attachment to some activity is their way to close off all the stimuli that they find overbearing and even painful to deal with. Dr. Schartz asks his autistic patients if there is anything that he needs to do to make the environment of his office better for them like: lowering the lighting, getting the trash out of the office if it is offensive to the heightened senses of his patients, or if the temperature in the room is comfortable for them. This is a very important aspect of allowing these folks to feel comfortable and if you weren’t aware of it, now you are.

Next, I learned that once the environment is settled and comfortable, autistic people can learn quite easily – so long as you teach to their way of thinking. How do you figure that out? By observing their responses and reactions to what you are asking them to do. By asking them what would work best for them.

Now, this is the most important information that I received from both my teen clients: If you want to be helpful to them, you must know how to listen to what they need. They are able to communicate that to you, if you would only listen, instead of deciding that you as the adult know better. I can tell you from my own work with all my clients, that a great amount of their problems they come to me with is due to the fact that no one validated their feelings, no one heard their request for help, instead doing what they thought would be of interest to the other. As one of my teen clients told me, just because I am good at making drawings and singing, doesn’t mean that I want to be enrolled in lessons for it. Maybe, I just want to be a kid, able to play in the dirt with my friends.

Another, thing my teen client told her mother while we were working together was that every time she asked for help, she wanted help with emotions, not the academics her parents were always helping her with.

If you are sick of nagging your kid, one of my teens gave great advise on this topic: tell them why it is important and perhaps give them something like some special one-on-one time together in return for their efforts. Most of all, if you tell your kid that you appreciate their efforts, you will find that they will be more compliant both in the chores around the home and most especially at school. Studies have been done that prove this out.

The most important thing that they both had to say was that they were upset that their parents were unable to help them in a way that was helpful to them. This was because they weren’t being able to be heard. These kids were endlessly frustrated by that which is expected of them to fit into a society that doesn’t understand how their mind works. So, here is the deal: allow your kid to be who they are, and respect that they are not you. They don’t necessarily share your values or interest and don’t need to. They are individuals with their own goals and values to be respected to the degree that these are productive and positive goals and values.

Lastly, do understand that our teens and college kids in general are under a lot of pressure. Sexuality is everywhere – and because kids don’t understand what it is, they are confused by it. Given that 1 in 3 females and 1 in 4 males will suffer sexual abuse, many times before they are old enough to even understand what it is, shame, guilt and frustration abound inside these kids minds. Depression and then addictions come up to not have to deal with these negative feelings.

It is our job as the adults in the world to better understand what is going on with the pressures our kids feel. To take off the pressures. Not every kid needs or wants to go to college to be successful. Today if you understand the business of internet marketing you can make a killing doing that as the world has come to you. Not every kid has to be s star at sports, and many resent being forced to do something that they didn’t enjoy just because they had the talent. Allow your kids to figure out what is meaningful and of interest to them, while helping them to better understand what they can and need to do to protect themselves from the internet’s hijacking of their youth. Help them to understand that they don’t have to have a Facebook page if they are uninterested in the negative comments or the boasting that goes on there. Help them to understand that they are allowed to have feelings and how to healthfully process those feelings – that generally change from moment to moment. Because the truth of the matter is that we don’t need to drug our kids, we need to teach them how to deal with their emotions, how to respect their bodies and their minds and how to find fulfillment in that which interests them. The rest will work itself out if we do that much for them now, while they are still developing.

Copyright © 2022 - 2024 Dawning Visions Hypnosis, Inc.. All Rights Reserved. Created by Blog Copyright.