6 Ways to Create More Joy in Your Life, Vol. 479, December 6, 2018

1. Get in touch with what is meaningful to you. If you have a passion or purpose in life, focus on it every day. If you have people in your life that are ‘taking you out of your own life,’ it is time to set some boundaries and learn to say the word ‘no’ to allow you to do those things that matter to you.

2. Hang out with people that are fun and interesting. People that share your interests and passions in life. Too often people spend their time with people who drain their energy being too needy, or with people that abuse or ignore them. These people are of no use to use and even a drag to you, so let them go. 

3. Engage in activities that increase your dopamine, your pleasure hormone:

   A) Get in the sunlight to get your vitamin D3

   B) Increase your activity level to keep your body strong and flexible – find things you enjoy

    C) Yoga

    D) Meditation or self-hypnosis

    E) Pleasurable music

    F) Eat a healthy diet including omega 3s, lean proteins, and plenty of colorful veggies and fruits

   G)  Drink plenty of clean, clear water

    4. Find time to play, be it group athletics or independently done activities. Grown-ups forget that life is to be enjoyed and don’t spend nearly enough time playing. 

    5. Spend time in contemplation. If you have a spiritual practice, do it every day. Few things are more helpful than our spiritual practices to allow us to know that there is more then what we can see in the material world.

6. Do something nice for someone, because that always makes the giver feel wonderful. It doesn’t need to be anything big, just a little assistance or a nice gesture is enough. 

Life is short enough, and as such, we need to make the time to do those things that bring joy to our lives. My father used to tell me that “Life is to be enjoyed.” I can tell you that he loved his dental profession, his tennis matches, his golf games, his racketball games and square dancing with my mother. He also enjoyed going out to eat and going to the movie theater. 

I believe he taught me what makes a great life and I invite you to do the same. Though I can also tell you that he loved his sweets – ice cream, chocolate candy and all kinds of cakes. Even dentists can have sweet tooth’s you know. So, enjoy each day and fill it up with meaningful activities including those that will keep you healthy and full of wellbeing.

How Do You Keep Yourself Motivated in Life? – Vol. 478, Nov. 29, 2018 

This was a question that I received on Quora, a forum where people ask questions and other people answer them. I loved this question because motivation is something that is important for so many aspects of life. So how do you stay motivated in life?

The only way to stay motivated in life is to do those things that you are interested in doing and enjoy. Motivation is an inside job, meaning that no one else can motivate you. Figure out what you want to do with your life’s energy and start working on it, a bit every day. You will be amazed at how easy motivation comes when you operate from this perspective.

Doing the things one “should” or “could” do would not be motivational. It has to be something that you care about and want to learn about and do.

I can tell you that any time I am given an interesting case to work in hypnotism, I get excited. I get truly motivated to look up everything on the subject of the issue the client has, to learn the background information to be of a true help to them. I get excited to work with how to do the work, and in some cases, it takes a consultation with someone else who knows more about the situation then I. That’s okay because I have mentored many people in my areas of expertise to help them do the best they can for their clients. 

But, you need to figure out what “drives” you and do those things. “Drivers” are those things that you feel compelled to do – and we are speaking of constructive positive things here, explicitly. So long as you do that, you will always be motivated, making life so much more fun and interesting

How to Get Over Feeling You Have Yet to Achieve Enough – Vol. 477, Nov. 22, 2018

I received this question on Quora, a forum where people ask and answer questions. There are so many young adults who feel that they haven’t achieved enough at their current age, usually 30 years old and younger. 

First, understand that there isn’t any “right” age to achieve things as we are all on our own journey. I am 57 years old and was so behind my peers after college graduation due to health issues. It was certainly frustrating, but now looking back, I have more than made up for it in terms of the magnificent relationships, amazing adventures all over the world, and having innovated in specific areas of my profession of hypnotism. These all occurred in my 40’s and later.

Currently, I am going for a masters degree in medical sociology, marrying my love of world cultures of all sorts with medical and psychiatric knowledge. 

So long as you dig deep inside yourself to live your values and beliefs, doing those things that matter to you, you are ahead of those who are living the average boring work-a-day life. Many marry too early, (I did, unfortunately) to have the marriage bring grief. Many have kids before they have a chance to explore the world, never able to do so with the expense and responsibility of raising kids.

There is never a rush to do anything in life. All there is, is time to explore your own interests, your own values and beliefs and create a life based on that, because the truth of the matter is that most people are miserable – doing jobs they don’t like and get little to no fulfillment from, and staying in marriage that perhaps aren’t healthy because the idea of being married, was more alluring then actually doing the real work involved in being present for another person and allowing them to be there for you in the same manner. It takes maturity to do this well. My advice: wait till you are 30 years old before getting married so that you know who you are and attract a person who is aligned with your values and beliefs while sharing some of your interests. If you don’t want kids, don’t have them, as you can’t give them back! They deserve your unconditional love, care, and interest each and every day! 

So, dig deep and allow yourself all the time you need to create something amazing for yourself. Realize that 80% of the things you try, won’t work out, and that is okay – it’s called research! As long as you keep your curiosity about the world, you can make it through and enjoy the days that make up your life, which is known as, ‘Creating your life the way you want it.’