Jul 21 2022

Why Did My Doctor Tell Me Hurtful and Damaging Information? Vol. 589, July 21, 2022

A person on Quora asked a question wanting to know why her doctor told her some very emotionally damaging things. This is my answer to her question based on 30-plus years in the world of medical and mental health as a provider in the conventional world of healthcare both mental and physical and that of hypnotism and Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP).
It is very sad that during medical training (which I opted out of for this very reason) that empathy is spoken of, yet the doctors and nurses never receive any from their instructors. They are trained to keep an emotional distance from their patients so that they don’t get emotionally harmed when terrible things happen to their patients – like having their patients die. I had brought this up during my nurse training to both the nurses who owned and ran the home care agency for elders that I worked at during this time and both my pharmacists. All of them told me that this was indeed the manner in which they were trained. That was 4 different people who gave me the same exact explanation. That isn’t to say that all medical personnel is callous assholes as I have had some excellent doctors as did my mom during the time I took care of getting her to her medical appointments. It is to say that there are too many who just cannot be real human beings with their patients. This is a really huge problem with licensed mental health professionals many falsely believe that their degrees give them the knowledge to help their patients. Yet, without the trust and buy-in of their patients into the treatment there is not a damn thing they can do to help – many do much more harm because they are incapable of putting themselves into the mindset of their patients where they could better understand the mental/emotional world of their patients and thus meet them where they are at, and then help them get to where they need to go in terms of true healing. But here again, without most of them knowing a thing about anatomy and physiology, and relying on a bunch of theories, they are not in a position to help many of their patients who have psychological issues that are causing symptoms that look like depression or anxiety but which may come from unbalanced hormones, chemicals in the food, leaky gut, neurological issues, side effects from the very medication that is supposed to help the problem, etc.
Much of the training is done to make sure that the medical professionals do not get too emotionally close to their patients. So, they are taught to have an emotional distance, which is what allows them to have a very poor bedside manner, and give out death sentences when they have no real way to know many times what the outcome could be for a patient who was actually given loving care – something that the empirical studies state will increase the likelihood of a patient overcoming pretty much any diagnosis given.
I have had many elders, my mom included scared by the manner in which they were spoken to along with the content of what was said. Worse I have had many younger clients complain to me about how their doctors spoke to them in an angry or distant manner and told them about the hopelessness of their diagnosis while never taking the ideas or concerns of their patients into consideration.
I. thank you for your question giving me that ability to speak the truth when many will go out of their way to state that my own and my client’s experiences are not the norms. We need to realize that they have been indoctrinated into a system that disregards the needs of the body and mind forcing toxic medications that have many side effects and requiring more toxic medications to deal with the side effects because these folks have no idea of how the body actually was created to heal itself – thanks to the lack of understanding based on their chemically-based training – reductionist thinking, and lack of regard for the human element that all true healthcare requires for real root cause healing to occur.

Jul 14 2022

Are There Any Other Ways To Get Help Other Than Therapy? Vol. 588, July 14, 2022

This was a question asked by a person on Quora and this is how I answered it: 

There are many forms of help out there that are NOT conventional mental health therapy – I do hypnotism and NLP finding the manner in which conventional therapy operates never ‘healing’ anyone – rather ‘managing symptoms.’

There are somatic (through the physical touch) therapies.

There are spiritual teachings that have helped many.

You need to research the various methods and the people who do them, so that you can find someone who matches your philosophies of healing and interview them before making an appointment.

If the first doesn’t work you try them out till you find someone who meshes with your philosophies of healing and your personality.

Thanks for the question.

Jul 07 2022

A Special Post For A Truly Special Person – for her Birthday! Vol. 587, July 7, 2022

Many years ago, I was sitting in a Mexican Restaurant close to where the National Guild Of Hypnotists convention was taking place with a client of mine. My cell phone rang with a woman on the other end of the phone who told me how she had been to see a psychiatric social worker for the very first time. Within 5 minutes of answering the question “Have you ever been suicidal?” Donna answered, ‘Yes.’ Note, that the question was not asking if she CURRENTLY was suicidal, just whether she had ever been suicidal. 

With that answer, Donna found herself being taken by the police from the psychiatric social worker’s office to a hospital to have her mental status checked. She was there from 3:30 or so in the afternoon till 1 AM because they kept bringing in more psychiatrists to evaluate her because the reality was that she didn’t belong there in the first place. She was feeling depressed and was falling backward and reaching out for help and this is what she had to deal with. 

She was released in time to get to her home for a quick shower before needing to leave for her job which was to begin at 6 AM but she liked to be there by 5 AM (maybe earlier, I can’t really recall because we are going back over a decade now.) Suffice it to say it was a horrific experience that led her to find an alternative way to help her with her problems.  

Today is Donna’s birthday, and I have to say that she is one of the top 3 clients who taught me so much about how to best help my clients heal. In her case, it wasn’t just the mental health world that screwed her over in this way. Several years later integrative doctors at the Marino Center in Cambridge, Massachusetts gave her a fasting test for sugars with some grain that she was allergic to – SOMETHING SHE TOLD THE INTAKE DOCTOR as I was there with her during this whole procedure. It was a damn good thing I went with her for the test because her sugar blood levels went dangerously low making driving herself home very dangerous for her and anyone on the road with her. 

She has 3 testimonials on this website demonstrating the efficacy of this work! 

She has also been a very strong believer in the work that I do, helping me do research over the years, and writing many blog posts for me while I was taking a medical leave back in 2009, featuring her great depth of chemistry, this being her profession along with her self-deprecating sense of humor creating truly great posts for the website. 

When I think back on all the times we spent together many times dismayed by the lack of knowledge and sometimes the callous behavior that ER staff had, her own GP back in the day before Donna fired her for good reason, and the educational and research pursuits we did together for so many years, I have to tell you that it was through the work that I did with Donna, that I learned how the body and mind are inextricably linked. As such, there is not a medical or mental health professional who can truly do a great job for their patients without understanding this connection…not ONE! This is why those with chronic conditions have such a difficult time getting the help necessary to put this problem behind them – the reductionist manner in which medical and mental health professionals are trained. 

It has taken Donna a few decades to get to the true cause of some of her issues with the help of a very special doctor who I had her check out many years ago. A doctor who helped an ex-boyfriend of mine from High School get rid of the heavy metals that poisoned his body for decades as well. 

So, if you ever receive help from a medical or mental health practitioner who believes they know more about your situation than you do, and yet, they are unable to help you – do as Donna did and find someone who can help you get to the ‘root cause’ of the problem be it physiological as was the case with Donna, though her symptoms looked to be emotional, or emotionally based as many of my clients with many physical symptoms such as migraine headaches, stomach pains, along with many chronic health issues have had. 

For healthcare to work, the provider needs to actually care about their patients’ outcomes, while allowing for the ability of their patient to fully heal. Without those conditions the patient is left to do all the hard work on their own, usually fighting the conventional reductionist outdated training of their practitioner. This is a fact now as we are learning that many of the tests that are done regularly either don’t prove a thing or actually can cause damage.  The CDC, the WHO, the US government along with many Western countries’ governments have learned through the judge forcing the FDA to release the filings that Pfizer gave them for the emergency use of their injection that is truly damaging especially to the young with blood clots forming, neurological problems, and even thousands of deaths as the result of pushing these toxic chemicals into the bodies of consumers who never had “informed consent.”  This is because the facts could not be known with the 4 months of pseudo-trials they did for a product that normally takes more than 10 years to go through testing.  These are the facts for anyone who is willing to find the facts as they are all over YouTube and the internet by those doctors and nurses who actually cared enough to risk their professions to tell us the truth! 

I thank Donna for teaching me about the mind-body connection, as well as the need for some of my clients to be brought into the higher consciousness – superconscious as well. Because, for Donna, this was the best way for her to be able to get the positive learnings necessary to heal. This is something I do with all my clients because the work goes faster and we get the best information to help them help themselves. 

I left the United States in October of 2019 to attend a Master’s program in Peace & Conflict Management where I learned all about the non-nation states of the US and other international organizations that falsely believe they have the right to take the rights away from the rest of us. However, when your government officials have a large amount of stock in the companies making these deadly injections, that will always trump what is best for the citizens. They do it by hypnotizing you by telling you lies while pretending that they are ‘facts’ while telling you that the real facts are ‘misinformation.’

But, this is the reality. We have known how viruses act and mutate for over a hundred years.  We also have known about natural immunity being the best immunity there is which is why there were chicken pox parties to get kids infected and over it to make them immune. We also know that the best way to keep our immune systems healthy is through being exposed to natural toxins in our environments. We know that healthy nutrient-rich food, and happy contented lives, will all keep us healthy, and yet, the environments that most people in the West live in are doing the exact opposite. This is why I chose to leave the US and am currently living in Mexico where the President is clear that each person has the right to decide their own medical treatments – something that was once enforced in the US with the HIPPA laws. 

So, I want to publically thank Donna for teaching me about the mind-body connection as well as helping with writing all those great blog posts and helping me learn so many things about how the body-mind-spirit are connected to form our health or our illness. Seriously, for so many who came after the work, I did with Donna, it was learning through her case history that gave me the knowledge necessary to help you. Because our clients and patients are indeed our best teachers if we allow them to be so. 

Jun 29 2022

Why do people feel unlovable? Why do people end up in unhealthy relationships? Vol. 586, June 29, 2022

Your career is going so well, yet your feel that your wife doesn’t love or respect you. Your kids don’t listen to you, leaving you to feel lonely and unsure of yourself.
 
Internally you feel really bad, yet from the outside, you feel like you should feel grateful for what you have, yet that isn’t your inner truth, not at all.
 
I had a client whose parents never saw her for who she was always wanting her to be someone else. The lack of love and care was overwhelming for her. As a grown woman she was driven to reach success through excellence trying to finally get the love and admiration that she never received as a child. She eventually reached the level of CEO, making 7 figures in salary with all the great perks as well. But that still was not enough, still did not feel loved or respected by her parents. Over the holidays her father still treated her like his servant wanting her to cook his gravy for him because that is what he wanted at that moment. After all these years and achievements she was still being treated like his caretaker.
 
I had another client that was raised by a judge in a very exclusive area in Connecticut. His father was well respected by the community. However living in his home was quite a different story, as his dad would get angry and strike him with a belt, most often never knowing why. This client was a great sales manager, but could never take credit for the work he did. In his mind anything positive could never be related to him, because he was trained by his dad that he is bad and incapable no matter what.
 
I have had many clients who have felt totally ‘unseen’ by their parents, meaning that their parents never saw them for the people that they felt they are. Their parents put their own expectations on them in some cases. In other cases, nothing they ever did matter to their parents, it was never enough. Children who are raised in this manner are constantly looking for love and validation by constantly working to achieve the unachievable. People in these situations even with the most loving families, success, and achievements will never feel good enough until they deal with the root cause of the issue.
The person who feels unseen, will end up feeling ‘unlovable’ and disrespected even if that is not the case in reality. Often they will end up in relationships that fulfill this sense of feeling unseen once again, perpetuating these negative feelings toward themselves. For those who were overachievers, many fall into having imposture syndrome, never taking credit for all the great success they have had.
 
The best way to overcome this type of traumatizing upbringing is to learn how to love and respect one’s self. My clients are able to do this simply by acknowledging their positive attributes such as being creative, able to problem solve, caring for others, etc. We also do forgiveness work for their parents around the negative interactions they had freed them from the anger that was causing ill will.
 
It shocks me how quickly my clients have been able to move past their past histories, creating a much better life for themselves and their own families.

Jun 25 2022

I JUST NEW LINKEDIN GROUP FOR STATE LICENSED MEDICAL PROFESSIONALS

I have been dismayed at the changes in how professionals use their groups here on Linkedin. Sadly, it has evolved into an advertising platform more than what it was in 2002 when I began interacting on the platform when ‘best practices’ were being learned from others. I have been dismayed with this change given the many really excellent professionals in the larger mental health groups who truly did their best to answer questions from their colleagues who needed more help in helping their more challenging patients.

Of course, there were a few who would overrun our boundaries telling us that what we were saying was breaking some rule of professional conduct.

I will tell you right here right now – the people who are brave enough to ask for help, and those who are willing to spend their own time helping others need not hear from those of you who don’t get it. That behavior will get you removed on the first incidence! I am not paranoid some patients will see the content as this is a group for LICENCED MEDICAL & MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONALS and even if it were not, to believe we can control our world in this day of AI is ridiculous. GET OVER IT!

This group was created so we could help one another help our patients/clients through the combined expertise of everyone in this group.

I will be posting a lot of content to do with the mind-body-spirit connection as I came into the world of hypnotism, neuro-linguistic programming, and Time Line Therapy (R) (created by Tad James which is different than Time Line taught at the National Guild of Hypnotists) after being dismayed with the treatment that I and many of my mental health clients received during our courses of treatment in the conventional world of medical/mental health care back in the early 1990s entering the world of the hypnotic arts myself in 2002.

It is my hope that this group will help those of you who came to the world of licensed healthcare to truly help your patients and clients to heal to do exactly that without ever having to defend your right to learn whatever proven techniques will help you to do just that!

You can read about my own 3 stories of healing using the hypnotic arts here:

https://lnkd.in/gsZcQbEs

I look forward to teaching you and learning from each of you as we continue our journeys in healthcare

Jun 22 2022

Why do parents distrust their kids? What happens when children are not given age-appropriate freedom and independence? Vol. 585, June 22, 2022

Do you feel that the world is an unsafe place for your child to play outside without adult guidance? Do you worry that your child will be kidnapped or worse? What about feeling the need to always protect your child from the natural consequences of their behavior be it in school, driving a car under the influence, etc?
 
I have a friend that came from a very overprotective family. Her parents were immigrants to the US from Japan. When it came to dating her parents kept her on a very tight leash. That was until she became an adult, moved out on her own, and got involved with a man who was selling cocaine and had unlicensed guns in his possession. She paid the very high price of going to jail for a year being involved with him. She stated to me that she believed that had she had the chance to interact with guys from a younger age she would have been able to better assess this man before getting involved with him. She was just too naive to make a better choice for herself.
 
I have had many clients who have complained about the fact that their parents have never allowed them to have the freedom to explore their world in the manner that their friends have. Often we would consider this ‘over protection’ by the parent of their child.
 
Why does this happen? Many times this happens because of the fear and perhaps even paranoia a parent experiences. Given the over-representation in the media of the world being unsafe for children, the parent feels that the only thing they can do to counteract these notions is to keep their child close to them or involved in adult-supervised activities.
What is the result of this over-protection of the child? With the lack of trust that the child feels from the parent in some cases they will go out and do things that the parent would not want them to do. In other cases, when it comes to the time dating many of these individuals have no sense of how to protect themselves from relationships with abusive partners or friends because they never had the chance to experience anything outside the safety of their own homes.
 
It is normal for children to individuate themselves from their parents as they go out to explore the greater world. When this is not allowed to occur, the child will grow up never understanding how to protect him/herself from the people who could be harmful to them.
 
How do we overcome this situation?
 
One needs to learn to let go of their suffocating their over-protection while allowing them to explore the world around them. Being able to play with their friends allows for creative problem-solving. Exploring their world allows them to develop a healthy curiosity around them, while maybe even building their natural immune systems by playing in the dirt while they are at it (for younger kids). If you are having a difficult time with this idea, it is time to get a bit of help to understand where your fear is coming from and to let it go. Your child deserves that much from you for your child’s healthy development.
 
 
 
 
 
 

Jun 16 2022

Why is it that my therapist diagnosed me with bipolar for the last 15 years and now I am told that I have Borderline Personality Disorder? Vol. 584, June 16, 2022

This was a question that a person on Quora asked which goes to the whole issue of how one is diagnosed with a particular mental illness in the first place, and then how misdiagnoses are made. Here is how I answered this question: 

There are some very clear differences between the two diagnoses so let’s take a gander and see what is really going on with you as mental health pros misdiagnose all the time.

Bipolar: One is going to have much longer periods between the moods they experience. A rapid cycle is considered 3 weeks – though many go months before going from one extreme to the other.

Borderline Personality Disorder: the moods are labile meaning that in a split second when triggered a person can go from happy to throwing things and cursing.

Both illnesses have a lot of anger involved – however, the BPD person will be enraged when they don’t get their way. It is a personality disorder which means the person though as intelligent as anyone is acting at the emotional age of a very young person – it is always about the ‘id’ wanting what it wants NOW and when it doesn’t get it, has a tantrum such as a 2-year-old would.

Both are master manipulators of themselves and others but go about it differently

Bipolar people will manipulate to get what they want usually by creating their fantastical ideas in business exaggerating what they can do and what they have to work with.

BPDs will manipulate to get the hole in their soul-filled usually through buying things they do not need, always asking for favors from others, and usually glomming on to one particular person more than anyone else – when that person does or says something that the BPD person finds hurtful, the BPD will drop them in a second and talk shit about them to the next person they glom onto. This is called ‘splitting’ between two people and is something that only BPDs do.

BPDs will self-harm – usually superficially while in a very depressed state.

Bipolars – 85% will self-medicate themselves with drugs – so while up they will take depressives, while down they will take amphetamines.

BPDs have a great fear of abandonment – they will do anything to stop others from abandoning even to the degree that they will abandon others before others have the chance to abandon them.

Bipolars do not have a fear of abandonment.

There are more differences between the 2 diagnoses, however, this gives you enough to better understand where you fall. DO NOTE THAT A PERSON CAN INDEED HAVE BOTH AT THE SAME TIME as we found out was true with my mother from the psychiatric staff at the nursing home where she lived the last 7 years of her life.

If you think you have BPD the best thing that you can do is to learn how to stop the impulses you have to be overly emotional, and instead use logic to make your decisions. It is also very helpful to just be more mindful of how you are coming across to others. It isn’t an easy thing to do at all, but it can be done if one wishes to stop pushing people away with what would be considered infantile behavior.

If you have Bipolar the best thing you can do is deal with feelings of unworthiness by figuring out what your best attributes are and owning them, dealing with your anger and your issues of sadness. I was diagnosed with bipolar 2 back in 1990 and was lucky enough to turn it around so that it is no longer a part of my life on any level back in 2004. Unfortunately, those with personality disorders are unable to truly overcome them, however, if you do those things that I suggested above and maybe get some Dialectical Behavior Training by a person who specializes in working with BPDs, you will be able to gain much control over the almost instantaneous shifts in mood and learn how to reduce the impulses to act out to get your way if you are indeed a BPD.

Thank you for asking this question because these 2 diagnoses are mixed up all the time as are those with schizophrenia and bipolar with psychotic features and many other types of diagnoses because the Diagnostic Statistical Manual has so many symptoms that overlap from one diagnosis to the next, especially in the 5th revision which basically notes that every normal human emotion receives its own diagnosis so the pharmaceutical companies can make even more money on their poison – NOTE: the only people that I believe ought to be placed on psychotropic medications are those who have psychotic features and at the most minimal dose to minimize their hallucinations. I have come to this conclusion after 30 years in the business both in conventional psychiatry and in complementary mental health in the form of hypnotism and neuro-linguistic programming (for 20 years now so plenty of time to have lots of case histories to prove the point that the mind is the best asset anyone has to make transformational change. However, I am unable to help those with psychotic features or those with personality disorders. Though I am able to help those with anxiety, major depression, bipolar, OCD, eating disorders, and sex addictions as I have been successfully doing this since 2002.

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