Do you feel that the world is an unsafe place for your child to play outside without adult guidance? Do you worry that your child will be kidnapped or worse? What about feeling the need to always protect your child from the natural consequences of their behavior be it in school, driving a car under the influence, etc?
I have a friend that came from a very overprotective family. Her parents were immigrants to the US from Japan. When it came to dating her parents kept her on a very tight leash. That was until she became an adult, moved out on her own, and got involved with a man who was selling cocaine and had unlicensed guns in his possession. She paid the very high price of going to jail for a year being involved with him. She stated to me that she believed that had she had the chance to interact with guys from a younger age she would have been able to better assess this man before getting involved with him. She was just too naive to make a better choice for herself.
I have had many clients who have complained of the fact that their parents have never allowed them to have the freedom to explore their world in the manner that their friends have. Often we would consider this ‘over protection’ by the parent of their child.
Why does this happen? Many times this happens because of the fear and perhaps even paranoia a parent experiences. Given the over-representation in the media of the world being unsafe for children, the parent feels that the only thing they can do to counteract these notions is to keep their child close to them or involved in adult-supervised activities.
What is the result of this over-protection of the child? With the lack of trust that the child feels from the parent in some cases they will go out and do things that the parent would not want them to do. In other cases, when it comes to the time of dating many of these individuals have no sense of how to protect themselves from relationships with abusive partners or friends because they never had the chance to experience anything outside the safety of their own homes.
It is normal for children to individuate themselves from their parents as they go out to explore the greater world. When this is not allowed to occur, the child will grow up never understanding how to protect him/herself from the people who could be harmful to them.
How do we overcome this situation?
One needs to learn to let go of their suffocating their over-protection while allowing them to explore the world around them. Being able to play with their friends allows for creative problem-solving. Exploring their world allows them to develop a healthy curiosity around them, while maybe even building their natural immune systems by playing in the dirt while they are at it (for younger kids). If you are having a difficult time with this idea, it is time to get a bit of help to understand where your fear is coming from and to let it go. Your child deserves that much from you for your child’s healthy development.
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Suzanne Kellner-Zinck founded Dawning Visions Hypnosis in 2002, She has become an innovator in the use of hypnotism and neuro-linguistic programming in the areas of obsessive compulsive disorders such as: eating disorders, sexual addiction and substance abuse as well as working with those with anxiety and mood disorders.
Her clients have come to work with her from across the United States and as far away as Africa to help them to finally be freed from these emotional issues that once ruled their lives. Today she is in the process of bringing her work to many more in the form of ebooks and other downloadable formats.
She is a member of American Holistic Medical Association and the American College for Advancement in Medicine.
Prior to founding Dawning Visions Hypnosis, Kellner-Zinck worked within vendor programs for the mentally ill working to help them to live up to their fullest potential. Many of her previous clients were able to move out on their own and find fulfilling work.
Kellner-Zinck is a Certified Trainer of Hypnosis and Neuro-Linguistic programing through Tad James Company, Inc. and a Master Hypnotist and Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming through Advanced Neuro Dynamics. She holds a bachelor’s degree in education and political studies from Curry College.
Dawning Visions Hypnosis is teaching people that they can indeed leave their unwanted behaviors behind as they move forward to living fulfilling and joy filled lives.
