What Do You Do About Critical Friends?

What Do You Do About Critical Friends, Vol. 476, Nov. 8, 2018 

Anyone who needs to blame or criticize others has a lack of a sense of self. One needn’t keep them in one’s life ever – they aren’t friends. A friend is someone who cares and is interested in how you are doing, and what you are doing in life – unconditional love and support – a positive influence in your life.

That being said, true friends will indeed tell you from their heart why they are concerned about you, never criticizing, just relating observations of your behavior for you to think about the potential need to change. 

They will not try to diagnose you either, realizing there is a boundary that needs to be respected. The only people who have the right to diagnose you are the people that you have employed to do so, to help you with your issue.

If anyone in your life is diagnosing you, without your employing them, even if they have a license to do so as a mental health professional, they are overstepping your boundaries. 

Now, the other side of the equation is this: Are you a person who criticizes others, blames others for what is going wrong with your life? Be honest with yourself, because there is an interesting dynamic that occurs in human interactions where one will bring into one’s life what one puts out in the world. In neuro-linguistic programming, we call this “projection is perception.” In this case, it is very helpful to acknowledge this aspect of your personality and clean it up. You may well find that others are no longer criticizing or blaming you any longer. 

I know in my own life, I have had to deal with the negative emotion of “anger” getting angry at others in my life. I had to deal with the fact that I was angry at myself for putting up with crap I shouldn’t have. Once I realized the dynamic of the anger coming from inside myself and cleared it out, no longer was I bringing the anger into my life. Now, if I find people have anger in themselves – speaking of anger toward the people in their lives, or acting angry toward others in my presence, I walk away from those relationships- these people are toxic to themselves and others. 

Life can be full of loving and caring people, but first, we must be loving and caring to ourselves, and then we can attract loving and caring people to us – people treat us with respect, the only people worth having in our lives. 

About Suzanne

Suzanne Kellner-Zinck founded Dawning Visions Hypnosis in 2002, She has become an innovator in the use of hypnotism and neuro-linguistic programming in the areas of obsessive compulsive disorders such as: eating disorders, sexual addiction and substance abuse as well as working with those with anxiety and mood disorders.

Her clients have come to work with her from across the United States and as far away as Africa to help them to finally be freed from these emotional issues that once ruled their lives. Today she is in the process of bringing her work to many more in the form of ebooks and other downloadable formats.

She is a member of American Holistic Medical Association and the American College for Advancement in Medicine.

Prior to founding Dawning Visions Hypnosis, Kellner-Zinck worked within vendor programs for the mentally ill working to help them to live up to their fullest potential. Many of her previous clients were able to move out on their own and find fulfilling work.

Kellner-Zinck is a Certified Trainer of Hypnosis and Neuro-Linguistic programing through Tad James Company, Inc. and a Master Hypnotist and Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming through Advanced Neuro Dynamics. She holds a bachelor’s degree in education and political studies from Curry College.

Dawning Visions Hypnosis is teaching people that they can indeed leave their unwanted behaviors behind as they move forward to living fulfilling and joy filled lives.