Vol. 546, April 23 – What are some things you can do to get over the loss of a loved one?
A Quoran asked this question. Given that I have specific techniques that I use with my clients, I was happy to share them on Quora. You the readers of my blogpost may find this information helpful as well if you are going through a loss. Here is how I answered the question:
This is a great question!
I work with clients to overcome their grief. Here are some things that one can do to overcome the loss of a loved one.
First, depending on who the person is to you, you may never fully ‘get over’ the loss. This would be if one were to lose a child or a partner that one was deeply in love with at the time of the death. It is also quite difficult to get over the loss of someone who commits suicide, especially if you never saw it coming.
Here are my suggestions:
- I always have my clients do this in a hypnotic state which you can do by allowing yourself to just relax. Close your eyes. Take a few breaths in and exhale slowly. Then tighten your muscles and releasing them going from your toes and feet up to your neck. Next, go back to the last time you saw the person. Remember the situation. Next, bring yourself to the time when you heard they had passed away, and then bring yourself to the wake (if they had one) and hear all the great things others said about the person. Then to the funeral and hear the great things said about them there. Now, bring them up in front of you and let them know what they meant to you. Lastly, bring them into your heart, thanking them for all they have contributed to your life. Then know that they will always be inside you because they are.
- Move on with your life, because that person would want you to. You can do things at times that remind you of the person. For example, I lost a close friend of mine last year, and I went by a soft-serve ice cream place. This guy loved this sort of ice cream (and gelato as well). So, I stopped off and had a chocolate-dipped ice cream cone in his memory – he bought many of these for both of us over the over 30 years that I was friendly with him.
- You can also wear something of theirs to keep their memory close to you. My dad died when I was 23 years old and was a great surprise to me. He was only 62 years old. I wanted the engagement diamond that he gave my mom because the was the gift of the greatest love he ever gave her. I asked her for it at the time of his death but told her to hold onto it for as long as she wanted. She remarried shortly after my dad’s death to a wonderful man. About 3 years later she called me to ask if I wanted this diamond and sent me up a ton of other special pieces that he had given her over the years. I was overjoyed! I got a necklace designed for all the few diamonds and wear it every single day. Yep, because as I wear it, I feel he is with me every single day.
- It is also good to have photos of the people that you love in your environment as well.
- Lastly, I put myself into self-hypnosis and talk to my dad sometimes. And, it may sound strange but he answers as well.
So, there you go – some things that one can do to deal with the loss of someone close to them. Over time the pain lessons, however, the great memories are great to hold inside you forever.
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About Suzanne
Suzanne Kellner-Zinck founded Dawning Visions Hypnosis in 2002, She has become an innovator in the use of hypnotism and neuro-linguistic programming in the areas of obsessive compulsive disorders such as: eating disorders, sexual addiction and substance abuse as well as working with those with anxiety and mood disorders.
Her clients have come to work with her from across the United States and as far away as Africa to help them to finally be freed from these emotional issues that once ruled their lives. Today she is in the process of bringing her work to many more in the form of ebooks and other downloadable formats.
She is a member of American Holistic Medical Association and the American College for Advancement in Medicine.
Prior to founding Dawning Visions Hypnosis, Kellner-Zinck worked within vendor programs for the mentally ill working to help them to live up to their fullest potential. Many of her previous clients were able to move out on their own and find fulfilling work.
Kellner-Zinck is a Certified Trainer of Hypnosis and Neuro-Linguistic programing through Tad James Company, Inc. and a Master Hypnotist and Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming through Advanced Neuro Dynamics. She holds a bachelor’s degree in education and political studies from Curry College.
Dawning Visions Hypnosis is teaching people that they can indeed leave their unwanted behaviors behind as they move forward to living fulfilling and joy filled lives.