Can A Schizophrenic on Antipsychotics Find a Partner & Live a Normal Life? Vol. 597, Sept. 15, 2022

A young person on Quora asked me a question regarding if she as a schizophrenic on antipsychotic medication would ever be able to live a normal life – being able to find a partner. I wrote her an answer with a love story from one of my case histories which will give you who are dealing with serious mental health histories can find some real hope.
 
Here is how I answered her:
 
Thanks for the A2A,
 
As the person who commented below stated – she was honest with her situation and all worked out well so far. However, I have a beautiful love story to share with you of one of my clients from long ago.
 
When I met her, she was 60 years old, divorced for many years, and living on money that her aunt had left her in a will. She was living in a cute attic apartment in a very large victorian home and had spent the last 35 years or so self-estranged from her family knowing that she couldn’t raise them given her psychotic episodes and general anxiety.
 
The first thing I told her before even getting to her living room, was that my job was to be fired as soon as possible because she was doing so well. She flipped out at that notion having been involved in the world of conventional mental health for so many decades.
 
I saw her for 9 months as she learned how to reclaim her own life again, and then moved on to a small college town in upper state NY to be close to her youngest daughter who had a 2-year-old son at the time. She helped to raise him and his brother who was born a couple of years later. However, it was the special man in the apartment downstairs from her who came into her life. they were friends at first and then the romance blossomed. They get married. He purchased a little cape cod-style home and renovated it for them. He also had a camper which they used to visit all their children during the nicer seasons of the year. They lived together happily for the rest of his life – so about 12 years or so.
 
I tell this story not just for you, but for others who may be a bit older and wondering what life could hold for them. This client had the best years of her life toward the end and it truly was magical. She did me the favor of sending me a card with a letter in it every year till her death (I am guessing) to let me know how her life was going. And, I did indeed reply to each one.
 
Keep your heart open and allow the right person to come in, at the right time. Love yourself for who you are and all the great qualities you have because I am sure you have them as my client had a sweet loving disposition through and through and was quite a great writer. And, at some point when you least expect it the right person will show up.
 
Thanks again for the A2A because we all need to know that if we have love in our hearts, there is someone there for us who will love us for exactly who we are.

The Chemical Imbalance of the Brain Theory of Mental Illness is A Marketing Ploy by Big Pharma – Vol. 596, Sept. 8, 2022

The article “The Serotonin Theory of Depression: a Systematic Umbrella Review of the Evidence” published July 20, 2022, proves the notion of ‘brain chemistry’ causing mental illness most especially depression as being nothing more than a great marketing ploy. Their article reviews the research up to now and there was never been any real data to back up these claims EVER!

For many patients, the idea that it is their brain chemistry that is off, instead of dealing with the real underlying cause of most of these issues, emotional issues most often based on experiencing trauma was a relief. However, this whole notion of brain chemistry did more harm than good for the many people who truly needed to deal with the negative effects of being traumatized, feeling that they were unworthy of love, money, etc. Instead, they were led down this path of potentially relieving the symptoms that were being caused by these emotional problems with medication, instead of doing the real healing work involved in overcoming these problems.

Unfortunately, most doctors do not have the time to read the actual studies so they believe what the pharmaceutical reps tell them as they peddle their psychotropic medications to them through office visits and having other doctors speak on their behalf at hospital conferences and meetings.

The findings of the meta-research are:

“This review suggests that the huge research effort based on the serotonin hypothesis has not produced convincing evidence of a biochemical basis for depression. This is consistent with research on many other biological markers. We suggest it is time to acknowledge that the serotonin theory of depression is not empirically substantiated.”

So, what are those in the health care field who are feeling depressed to do? And, how can they better help their patients without mind-altering and with negligible positive results?

How about doing the obvious:

Getting some exercise which may take you a couple of minutes to get into, however, the serotonin starts releasing making you happy for the day. If you do your exercise outside by biking, hiking, swimming or playing a sport you enjoy, you will be able to get your Vitamin D which is important in helping one feel happy and alive.

Fish Oil was suggested by my psychiatrist back in 2000 when the lithium I was on was slowing down my kidneys after 13 years of being on it. I never tried it because I found a 5-minute technique shortly thereafter that took care of the problem forever.

I will tell you that my manic depression which was diagnosed in 1990 which is why that term was used instead of bipolar 2, was treated for 13 years with lithium, at times at such a high dose I could not do the most mundane of things because I could not think clearly, and my energy level was so low. I finally got rid of it through a process called Time Line Therapy (R) which my neuro-linguistic trainer, Tad James created in the 1980s. It is a simple process. However, when I was told this is what I needed to do, my brain was so non-functional that I could not recall how to do it even though I had been using this great technique with my clients for the past 8 months. It was a good thing that he was able to tell me the 3 negative emotions that needed to be cleared as I was taken off the lithium as a result of my kidneys beginning to slow down. That 5-minute intervention got rid of the symptoms of bipolar 2 – so hypnotism and neurolinguistic programming are my go-to modalities to heal myself of pretty much anything considered a chronic illness these days.

Dump your negative friends and relatives. No one needs to have that in one’s life.

Dump the mass media news as most of it is paid for by big pharma which is why you are not going to receive the truth regarding health care, and most of it is created to make one nervous, angry, and have feelings of loss.

Listen to uplifting music, or watch comedy on Youtube. It’s hard to feel down when you are allowing happy energy into your life.

Call a friend who cracks you up. I call my Godson whenever I am a bit frustrated or miffed about something because he has the great talent of knowing how to make me laugh without even thinking about it – he just says something and it cracks me up. It’s his greatest talent as far as I am concerned.

Some people have symptoms of depression because they are unable to metabolize the amino acids from the proteins they consume to make the neurotransmitters. If you have not experienced trauma, etc then this may very well be the real cause of your problems.

A leaky gut is another issue that gets in the way of making neurotransmitters, so if you are feeling muscular pain throughout your body because of the inflammation caused by tiny food particles going between the one-cell thick lining of your stomach into your body, this is something to get checked out by a functional or integrative doctor because they have the means to get the correct testing and the right nutrients, and pre and probiotics to help you heal your gut.

Hormonal imbalances especially around mid-life when estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone get much lower are another huge problem for folks. I had two nurses come into my practice for whom this was their problem. However, men also can feel low mood with a lack of testosterone being made in their bodies. One needs to see an endocrinologist or a compounding pharmacist that specializes in sex hormones to have this situation best resolved. A compounding pharmacist saved my life when I was going through this problem myself 20 years ago.

Prescription medications especially antidepressants have been known to cause depression and homicidal feelings in people, many younger patients are affected in this way, but not always which is why there is a ‘black box’ caution on the package of antidepressants and has been for quite a while now. And, there are other medications that can cause depressed feelings, so get that checked out with your pharmacist since they are the experts in medication and the interactions between medications.

Some herbal health products can also cause problems, especially when used while one is taking prescription medication. This was something another of my clients experienced by taking a ‘natural anti-anxiety herbal product while she was on pain medication. She fainted in her boss’s office. Her sister found the problem reading the insert on the herbal product.

So, depression, like physical pain is a symptom that something is wrong and the ’cause’ of the depression needs to be found to effectively get rid of it.

So how about using those methods that have been proven to help – that are non-invasive and will not injure a person’s brain processing? How about doing what we know helps because these interventions are based on how the body was created to work? And, how about we stop beating ourselves up for feeling the way we do and take the proactive steps we all can take most of them easily implementable if we would only take the actions to do them on a daily basis?


Resource:

Moncrieff, J., Cooper, R.E., Stockmann, T. et al. The serotonin theory of depression: a systematic umbrella review of the evidence. Mol Psychiatry (2022). https://doi.org/10.1038/s41380-022-01661-0https://www.nature.com/articles/s41380-022-01661-0?utm_medium=affiliate&utm_source=commission_junction&utm_campaign=CONR_PF018_ECOM_GL_PHSS_ALWYS_DEEPLINK&utm_content=textlink&utm_term=PID100062364&CJEVENT=f59e0ead126e11ed8370005a0a1c0e0c#Sec13

What are the implications for a therapist who does not know their own values and biases? Vol. 600, October 6, 2022

This was an interesting question that a person on Quora asked and here is how I answered it:

This is a great question.

Every person is going to have their own individual values and biases based on how they were raised and any negative events that may have negatively affected them through life.

It is imperative that anyone who is working with others realize that it is never okay to foist one’s own values and beliefs onto a patient or client. The goal is to work within the patient’s or client’s value system respecting it for what it is.

The problem is that many people cannot discern themselves and their values and beliefs from others therefore falsely believing they have ‘the answer’ to living a great life, evangelizing their own values and beliefs.

The other issue that is brought up in this question is that of therapists with their own biases. Again, the work is based on the client and has very little to do with the personal ideals of a therapist. The therapist’s role is to focus on the patient’s best interest and that interest always has to do with helping the patient to heal. This is the only reason for a patient to be seeing a therapist, so it is mandatory for the therapist to keep personal biases out of the session work.

Again, many therapists have not done their own work of healing, therefore, carrying around a lot of false notions about what their role is. Unfortunately many do not receive the guidance needed to fulfill their roles in an ethical and helpful way in training or post-training compounding the problems you raise.

I would also add that those with licenses to protect, will force their patients to do things that may be unnecessary in the higher need of ‘covering their asses’ in the cases where they are concerned for the patient’s wellbeing. Too many are incapable of truly hearing the answers to their own questions looking for reasons to have a psych evaluation, or continuing a patient on drugs that are not only not helping the patient function, but are causing mental, emotional, or physical problems because the therapist is fearful of what may happen if the patient is taken off the drugs. This is why so many mental health patients complain about being forced to figure out for themselves how to get off these mind-altering and all to often physically toxic drugs.

These are real issues that I have had to help my own clients contend with over the decades that I have been in mental health so they are real and need to be respected for what they are. It is impossible for another person to understand what the patient is experiencing themselves – the only thing they can do is listen carefully and change the course of treatment if that is being requested due to unnecessary duress on the part of the patient – but many will not do this for the above reason.

Most licensed therapists will never admit that these are real problems, instead stating that the patient is incapable of knowing what is going on in their own body, which of course is a bunch of garbage, one more way that those with the stigma of mental illness are further marginalized.

So, the best course of action is to find a therapist that one feels comfortable with because that therapist is emotionally healthy, and is able to respect one’s input regarding the type of care given with the understanding that the therapy and medication need to benefit the patient regardless of what the therapists own values, beliefs, or biases may be. That means finding someone who is capable of both listening to the patient’s concerns and taking the actions needed for the comfort and capacity to live a decent life of the patient – for they are there to serve the patient, not further marginalize and demean them because they have the ‘fancy letters after their names.’

Thanks again for this question – it is one that the therapists will not be able to answer honestly because they truly believe that they do everything possible to help their patients when the facts do not bear this out – as noted by the many questions by patients asking why it is so difficult to find a therapist that can and will truly help them – right here on Quora – I receive this type of question way too often to believe otherwise.

Why Do Some Therapists Shame Their Clients? A Quoran Asked – Vol. 595, September 1, 2022

Andie is a person on Quora who has asked me many very thoughtful and at times harsh questions about the world of therapy over the years. Here is how I answered her question: 

Hi Andie,

As you know, Andie given all the answers I have written to your questions over the last year or more you know that I am answering this question from the perspective of being a hypnotist and neuro-linguistic programmer (NLP) who spent several years working in conventional psychiatry as a counselor before moving into hypnotism and NLP.

I appreciate your effort to get an answer to why counselors use the “shame approach’. I really never have heard of it put that way, however, I can tell you that I have had many clients who had addiction issues and eating disorders complain of being treated like crap by their previous counselors. Not listening to what they had to say. Blaming them for not following a treatment plan that wasn’t working for them, blaming them for their mental health issues (symptoms of the mental health issues). I can also attest to the fact that I have witnessed these exact problems while working in mental health programs for mentally ill adults by my program directors in too many cases – so it does indeed happen. It was these incidences that brought me into hypnotism and NLP for a more humanistic manner of working with my clients without the diagnoses as we are not licensed to give them and work very diligently to remove the label by removing the symptoms that brought the label in the first place.

That being said, I would discern between those counselors who actually do blame their clients for their problems instead of listening to the perception that their client has relative to the challenge that they employed their counselor to help release.

I would have to say that I do my best to take a thorough Detailed Personal History so I understand why it is that the problems developed through the type of emotional traumas suffered, by whom, and at what ages. When one takes the time to do this (it takes me about 2.5 – 3 hours to do a Detailed Personal History) it becomes more obvious what the client has been through and how and why these dysfunctional thoughts and behaviors developed (the reasons anyone would employ someone like me to work with them).

I also want to be very clear that there are times when I am very assertive in doing ‘reality checks’ with my clients which is not so much about shaming as it is about bringing awareness as to how it is that they are creating the problems that they have. Without this understanding, it becomes impossible to truly make the changes necessary to be rid of these issues.

An example of this would be a female client age 40 who is married to one man who is a citizen of another country, currently not allowed back into the US, and was dating another man who was making her life miserable given his demeaning attitude, creating all types of distressful situations by not following through on things that he agreed to do, and worst of all being physically abusive to her.

The reality check in this situation was simply this: If you are already married, why are you in another relationship with another man? Why are you complicating your life in this manner?

We spoke about it and I gave her some homework to do journaling in a very specific manner to find out if this is a person that she still wants in her life. She figured out that she was most definitely ready to get him out of her life along with all his friends and relatives and renewed her relationship with her husband by visiting him for a month in the country that he is living in.

I don’t consider this a ‘shaming’ of my client thought she could have taken it that way. However, she was more interested in being well and getting on with her life doing what needed to be done to allow that to happen. It’s called holding a client accountable for their actions. And, it is through accountability that clients are able to fully understand why they have the confusing, distractive life that they do.

So, as mental health professionals, we need to be very clear with our clients so they can make the connections necessary to understand why they find themselves in the situations they do. And, interestingly enough, though many times my clients are not that happy to hear what I have to say in my ‘reality checks’ they do indeed appreciate finally gaining the insight into their problems that were missing previously.

As always, I thank you for your question on behalf of those who will be reading it once posted.

Is Attitude the Most Important Differentiator? Vol. 594, August 25, 2022

This was a question that was asked by a person on Quora. Given all the events of the past couple of years, it is an important question to be asking ourselves.  Here is how I answered the question: 

Thank you for this question.

Yes, one’s attitude is the most important differentiator is everything one does in life. Think of it this way: If one is secure in one’s self, and is looking for an answer to a question – all that is needed is the facts to make a decision on how to move forward. So, a calm pleasant demeanor is the difference between getting what you want and maybe more, than getting a runaround.

If one is positive in creating the desired results in life, one will attract those who can best help one to gain the knowledge and experience necessary to move ahead. This is especially true if one is willing to give of one’s self and be teachable/coachable.

No one wants to be around a person who feels sorry for themselves and feels entitled. These people have issues that they need to resolve with a professional’s help.

Relationships are the difference in creating opportunities, so be mindful of how you come across to others. Be authentic, and be humble, share your knowledge, and miracles occur. Miracles occur most especially at those times when one needs them, because those of us who take risks, need those miracles to occur on a regular basis. However, it is by being helpful and understanding, that others are willing to be there for you when needed.

Do understand that your attitude is either going to make you or break you. Think about those people that you truly enjoy being around and that is your answer.

(Unless you are depressed and like being around depressed negative people, in which you need the help of a professional.)

 

After 15 Years I Found Out That I Was Misdiagnosed with Bipolar Now Being Informed that I have Borderline Personality Disorder and I am Unsure How To Feel About it. Any Advice? Vol. 602, October 20, 2022

This was a question from a person on Quora. It is a very important question because it raises the question of misdiagnosis and the ramifications of that on the patient. Here is how I answered the question by explaining the differences between the two diagnoses. 

There are some very clear differences between the two diagnoses so let us take a gander and see what is really going on with you as mental health pros misdiagnose all the time.

Bipolar: One is going to have much longer periods between the moods they experience. A rapid cycle is considered 3 weeks – though many go months before going from one extreme to the other.

Borderline Personality Disorder: the moods are labile meaning that in a split second when triggered a person can go from happy to throwing things and cursing.

Both illnesses have a lot of anger involved – however, the BPD person will be enraged when they don’t get their way. It is a personality disorder which means the person though as intelligent as anyone is acting at the emotional age of a very young person – it is always about the ‘id’ wanting what it wants NOW and when it doesn’t get it, has a tantrum such as a 2-year-old would.

Both are master manipulators of themselves and others but go about it differently

Bipolar people will manipulate to get what they want usually by creating their fantastical ideas in business exaggerating what they can do and what they have to work with.

BPDs will manipulate to get the hole in their soul-filled usually through buying things they do not need, always asking for favors from others, and usually glomming on to one particular person more than anyone else – when that person does or says something that the BPD person finds hurtful, the BPD will drop them in a second and talk shit about them to the next person they glom onto. This is called ‘splitting’ between two people and is something that only BPDs do.

BPDs will self-harm – usually superficially while in a very depressed state.

Bipolars – 85% will self-medicate themselves with drugs – so while up they will take depressives, while down they will take amphetamines.

BPDs have a great fear of abandonment – they will do anything to stop others from abandoning even to the degree that they will abandon others before others have the chance to abandon them.

Bipolars do not have a fear of abandonment.

There are more differences between the 2 diagnoses, however, this gives you enough to better understand where you fall. DO NOTE THAT A PERSON CAN INDEED HAVE BOTH AT THE SAME TIME as we found out was true with my mother from the psychiatric staff at the nursing home where she lived the last 7 years of her life.

If you think you have BPD the best thing that you can do is to learn how to stop the impulses you have to be overly emotional, and instead use logic to make your decisions. It is also very helpful to just be more mindful of how you are coming across to others. It isn’t an easy thing to do at all, but it can be done if one wishes to stop pushing people away with what would be considered infantile behavior.

If you have Bipolar the best thing you can do is deal with feelings of unworthiness by figuring out what your best attributes are and owning them, dealing with your anger and your issues of sadness. I was diagnosed with bipolar 2 back in 1990 and was lucky enough to turn it around so that it is no longer a part of my life on any level back in 2004. Unfortunately, those with personality disorders are unable to truly overcome them, however, if you do those things that I suggested above and maybe get some Dialectical Behavior Training by a person who specializes in working with BPDs, you will be able to gain much control over the almost instantaneous shifts in mood and learn how to reduce the impulses to act out to get your way if you are indeed a BPD.

Thank you for asking this question because these 2 diagnoses are mixed up all the time as are those with schizophrenia and bipolar with psychotic features and many other types of diagnoses because the Diagnostic Statistical Manual has so many symptoms that overlap from one diagnosis to the next, especially in the 5th revision which basically notes that every normal human emotion receives its own diagnosis so the pharmaceutical companies can make even more money on their poison – NOTE: the only people that I believe ought to be placed on psychotropic medications are those who have psychotic features and at the most minimal dose to minimize their hallucinations. I have come to this conclusion after 30 years in the business both in conventional psychiatry and in complementary mental health in the form of hypnotism and neuro-linguistic programming (for 20 years now so plenty of time to have lots of case histories to prove the point that the mind is the best asset anyone has to make transformational change. However, I am unable to help those with psychotic features or those with personality disorders. Though I am able to help those with anxiety, major depression, bipolar, OCD, eating disorders, and sex addictions as I have been successfully doing this since 2002.

What Do I Do If I Believe I Have Depression, Anxiety, OCD, etc? Vol. 593, August 18, 2022

Do you try to diagnose your medical conditions where doctors are licensed to do this and still get it wrong because of all the overlapping symptoms in various illnesses?

I really don’t know why:

  1. Folks want to diagnose themselves with mental illness – something that has a great stigma around it which is why few people actually get the help they require – especially men!
  2. Why it is now seen as an asset to have these problems that cause so much distress for the people who have them.
  3. Why it is that people are always going on social media asking about these things instead of going to a licensed professional if they are so hell-bent on being given some diagnosis.

Back in the very late 1980s when I was first diagnosed with depression first since my symptoms showed up in that manner – and then got rediagnosed with manic depression (before the bipolar term was used) when the antidepressants I was placed on cycled me into hypomania – (below mania) there were many people who looked down on me. – infantilized me, never thought I could ever overcome these problems…and yet I did 14 years after diagnosis with NLP – (neuro-linguistic programming) off the meds with my psychiatrist’s help – she followed me for 10 months, and then I terminated no longer wanting to be a hypocrite because I was telling my clients they didn’t need the old conventional way of dealing with mental illness – take a drug, try really hard to do cognitive behavioral therapy – etc. Instead, let the area of the mind that houses those internal representations (the subconscious UNconscious mind) tell us what the cause of the problem is, and why you are still holding. onto it, and helping you get your compelling future so there is much more allure to healing as quickly as possible so you can live your best life.

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